Halls

The Setting
The marketing conference room at Cadbury Adams world headquarters in Parsippany, NJ.

In Attendance
The ad agency's account executive; the VP of marketing and all four marketing managers for Halls Cough Drops.

The Topic
The new television commercial being proposed by the ad agency.

The Conversation
Account Executive: You're going to love this. It's so cool!

VP: Go ahead.

Account Executive: OK, there's this really cool guy - around 30 - he hasn't shaved in a couple of days, so we know he's really, really cool. Oh, and we pull out most of the color so it looks like a really hip music video or something. It's artsy if there's not much color.

Marketing Manager for Halls Defense: The kids will like that! MTV-ish.

Account Executive: OK, our hip guy is getting into an elevator. He's the only one. Then when the door starts to close, some big, obnoxious plumber-type barges into the elevator. Our guy looks really annoyed.

Marketing Manager for Halls Breezers: I hate it when that happens!

Account Executive: The door starts to close, and somebody sticks their foot in the door and another person comes in - a really fat old woman. She's wearing really ugly shoes. The guy rolls his eyes and just then another guy pushes his way in - probably an ethnic type.

VP: Not too ethnic, OK? They don't use our products.

Account Executive: No problem. Then our guy reaches into his pocket and pull out a package of Halls.

Marketing Manager for Halls Naturals: What kind?

Account Executive: Uh, kind of generic I guess.

The Marketing Managers all grumble a bit.

Account Executive: He pops the Halls into his mouth and we do this little animation of the fumes...

VP: ...soothing vapors...

Account Executive: Oh, sorry. The "soothing vapors" go up into his nose and them WHAM!

Marketing Manager for Halls Originals: What?

Account Executive: All of the annoying people get flattened against the walls of the elevator. Literally. We do this cool effect where we make them into pancakes.

VP: Like a Road Runner cartoon? When the coyote gets run over by a steam roller?

Account Executive: Exactly! Then the doors open and our guy walks out. We say something memorable about the soothing vapors and end with someone slowly peeling off the wall.

Marketing Manager for Halls Originals: Did he have a cough or a cold?

Account Executive: No.

VP: Well, we're a cough drop company. People take our product when they have a sore throat or stuffy nose.

Account Executive: That's the beauty of this! We're going to send sales through the roof because you don't have to be sick to use Halls any more! If you're cool and in a crowded elevator - take a Halls!

The VP doesn't seem too happy, but the Marketing Managers whisper excitedly among each other.

Marketing Managers (in unison): I like it!